She’s not my wife.

woman comes home and tells her husband, “Remember those headaches I’ve been having all these years?” “Well, they’re gone.”

“No more headaches?” The husband asks, “What happened?”

His wife replies, “Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat ‘I do not have a headache; I do not have a headache, I do not have a headache.’ It worked. The headaches are all gone.”

Then his wife replies, “You know, you haven’t exactly been a blaze in the bedroom the last few years. Why don’t you go visit the hypnotist and see what he can do for you?” The spouse agrees to give it a go.

Following his appointment, the husband returns home, tears off his clothing, and drags his wife into the bedroom. “Don’t move, I’ll be right back,” he adds as he places her on the bed. He walks into the restroom, returns a few minutes later, gets into bed, and makes passionate love to his wife like he’s never done before.

His wife says, “Damn! That was wonderful!”

According to the spouse, “Don’t budge! I shall return shortly.” He returns from the restroom, and round two was much better than the first. The wife stands up, her head whirling.

“Don’t move,” her husband adds again, “I’ll be right back.” He then walks back into the bathroom. This time, his wife follows him discreetly, and in the bathroom, she finds him standing in front of the mirror, saying,
She’s not my wife.

She’s not my wife.

She’s not my wife.

His funeral service will be held on Saturday

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