The owner of a company tells his employees one day He said: “You worked very hard this year, therefore the company’s profits increased dramatically. As a reward, I’m giving everyone a check for $5,000.”...
A 72 year old man had one hobby – he loved to fish. He was sitting in his boat the other day when he heard a voice say, ‘Pick me up.’ he looked around...
An old man from Alabama moves to New York. He walks into an “Everything under one roof” department store looking for a job. He sits down, greets the manager, and shakes his hand. The...
A lawyer is trying to call his clients. The phone rings and their little boy whispers, “Hello.” L = Lawyer B = Little Boy L: “Is your mother here?” B: (whisper) “Yes.” L: “Can...
Husband takes his wife to play her first game of golf. Of course, the wife promptly hacked her first shot right through the window of the biggest house adjacent to the course. The husband...
Johnny: Hello Teacher, let me ask you a question. Teacher: Okay. Johnny: How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator? Teacher: You can’t, it’s too big. Johnny: Wrong. All you have to do...
A New York attorney representing a wealthy art collector called and asked to speak to his client. “Saul, I have good news and bad news.” The art collector replied, “You know, I’ve had an...
Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school. Her marks were good…mostly A’s and a couple of B’s. However, her teacher had written across the bottom: “Sally is a smart little girl, but...
A little boy was on the bus the other day and he really needed to fart. Luckily the music was really loud so he timed his farts with the beat, and after a couple...
Johnny wanted to sit next to one of his teachers at lunch. However, the teacher looked at Johnny with an arrogant face and said, “A swan will not be friends with a pig.” “Then...